How many of you have ever felt like your all alone? How many of you have ever felt all alone when you have tons of family? Have you ever felt like no one gives a dam? Have you ever felt like you give with nothing ever returned?
I am here to tell you about a person that began feeling like that very recently.
I have known this lady for a long time. She is the one that is always there to give a card or gift to anyone that has a birthday, wedding, baby, death or just because someone is having a bad day. She is the one that calls to make sure friends are ok. She is always concerned about others feelings and how they will take anything that is said. This lady goes out of her way to make sure everyone feels good and does not feel left out.
Now over the years she had noticed that the people that say thankyou, or send things to her began to decrease. That did not stop her from continuing to send and give to others. This year things got even worse.
This lady had spent time and lots of energy looking for special things for people that were special. She sent parcels to family and friends, hoping to make everyone happy and feel wanted and special in some way. She watched the mail daily for the cards that were normally expected for her birthday. She got a few, but not what she had expected. The family must have been busy. They have their own lives. Then came Christmas. She sent out cards to everyone she could think would like to hear from her. There were cards from a few friends, that were returned. She knew that people have busy lives, but she started to think about all the things she had done over the years. Now she started to think about all the times she had been sad and few every came and gave her a shoulder or said it would be ok.
She looked at the pile of gifts that were sitting in the corner of the living room. She had sent parcels and checks or money orders to all the people that were special in her life. There was no gifts for her. She had purchased a couple of things for herself. Things she had purchased so she would have something to open Christmas morning. She felt unloved and unwanted.
As the days passed and her sorrow built, she thought long about all she had done over the years. It was funny when you heard her talk about silly things like slippers, mitts and hats that made her smile. Pictures that had been put on her wall the minute she received them. The things that the grandkids had made, that she kept forever. She loved to show the box of things she had received over the years from the grandkids. Now the kids were grown and no longer made anything or even came to see her. She no longer gets those wonderful things that made her smile so much. There is one that still comes to see her and her heart skips everytime she hears from that grandchild. Everyone called Christmas day and told of all the wonderful things they had been given. When asked what she got, she just smiled and changed the subject. How do you tell everyone that a picture was all that came, without sounding like you are greedy and wanted more. She just wanted to be part of the fun. She did not want to be left out.
She sat and read of all the wonderful days that others had enjoyed. It made her cry. She did not know what to say or do. She sat quietly and watched TV. She was in the middle of making a blanket for a baby that was coming. A baby that was not hers or related to her. All of a sudden she realized, no matter how much she tried, she could not stop what she was doing. It was not in her nature.
She resigned herself to the fact that others have their own lives. No matter how much you want to be part of them, if you are not close you may not be remembered, or at least not how you would like to be. Though over the next year, things may change. Things may not be the way they were. She says that no matter what she won't change. She likes making others happy, even if it makes her sad.
Next time you are lucky enough to get a card, gift or a special call, remember to make them feel special. They just did it for you. Someday that person will be gone. You talk once in a while and everything is gone in the blink of an eye............"then there is none".
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